We are WildFlowers

Doing What Makes Me Feel Good

I had asked this question on my facebook page but wanted to also share with my blog mates as well. And also say thank you agin to the ones who commented on my page I appreciate the love and understanding.
Okay I have a question, I know many will feel differently than I do but here goes:
Do you think it’s wrong that I chose not to go to a thanksgiving gathering?
I spent thanksgiving with my husband though just relaxing at home.
I was told everyone wants to see me and was hounded about it until the day came, afterwards was told that they missed me and wish that I would come back around.
Now these are people I never see or hear from, not one has ever called me to talk, see how I’m doing. And the only reason I know they exist is I was dragged to go see them as a child, teenager and probably some in my twenties as well. I’m 30 years old and if I don’t want to go somewhere I shouldn’t have to. If I don’t want to be around certain people, or a lot of people I shouldn’t have to be. I don’t like to get pressured into doing things and this caused my anxiety to start up. It’s not about being right or wrong, it’s about me thinking about me. They will never understand how I feel…
And already the question of me showing up for Christmas for my dad side of the family had come up, thanksgiving was my mom side. I want to just be on my side, and relax with myself and try to have peace of mind. If you don’t care enough to pick of a phone to talk to me, then you don’t need to see my face.
I would just rather love them from afar.
At one point I told myself I’m becoming grumpy and bitchy, but I’m just thinking about myself more; that is all.




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