I stepped out of my comfort zone this week. A store I went into were hiring for stocking and I got an application. It’s a small dollar tree store and it really needed help. My mom and I asked if you can just get hired just to stock and they said yes. I’m hoping that this will be the first time, well I take that back the second time I can get hired not to be a cashier. I have most of my experience in retail, also was a assistant manager so I qualify for the job. The only thing is, I haven’t worked in years. I know I don’t want to handle the stress of being a cashier but being on the floor and organizing things is the part I always enjoyed.
Plus dealing with the symptoms of fibromyalgia a lot has changed with myself. Also my anxiety had gotten worse, so it’s a big step for me to have taken the application back yesterday. I drove myself, which is a big deal now. I have to wait until Monday and I will see what happens.
At least I’m making an attempt.
I just want to do something that won’t be too much stress on me and can give me a income to contribute, so I won’t feel like a waste of space or at least put a little money in my pocket.
Monday I started a new exercise routine that I felt would be easy enough for me to do and I could keep it up. Tuesday came and I was very sore, to the point I was walking like tin-man. I decided I would rest one day then get back to the next and keep this pattern going.
All day Tuesday I was sore and felt like this was going to be a total failure again. While in bed sleep thinking about Wednesday, I was creating excuses in my head. All night through early morning, as I get in and out of bed to use the bathroom, I’m so sore and I just know I won’t be able to do any kind of workout.
I’m thinking that just getting up out of bed is good enough. Walking around to get stuff done is good enough. I want to lie in bed and let my body not be sore anymore. Truth is though my body might never not be sore, I would be waiting forever.
That point came when I was ready to get up and I made me some ice coffee, took some vitamins and I seemed to be walking a little easier, I was still feeling sore but I felt I could definitely move around.
I put my sneakers on and played some music and got started. I did my exercise and I’m proud of myself for not giving in to my excuses.
April 4, 2014
Say to yourself:
I am ready.
You must go beyond how you feel.
I got down on the floor and did five crunches, five leg raises and a ten second plank. I was shaking and it was not comfortable at all. We all know that tender spot on the lower back and buttocks where it’s sore. I don’t like lying down on any floor because it hurts. But I need it, why? Because if I want to lose weight and better myself, I have to do something to make those changes. [I take the pain]
If we are going to be in pain anyhow, why not give yourself reasons worth feeling that pain and possibly have some positive results come from it. I dislike hurting for no reason at all, I can be relaxing and just get a headache. Does not matter what I do, so why not do what matters and make it count.
When finding that strength within, which I know we all have to do each and everyday to make it through. That inner strength allows you to do things greater than you could ever imagine.
“Things change, but the sun always rises the next day. – The bad news: nothing is permanent. The good news: nothing is permanent.”
“Even when it’s hard to move, take small steps forward. – Especially in trying times, it’s important to continuously push yourself forward. Because momentum is everything! As long as you keep the momentum positive – even if you’re moving at a snail’s pace – you’ll eventually get to the finish line. So celebrate every step you take today, no matter how small. Because every step will lead you farther away from where you were yesterday and closer to where you want to be tomorrow. Be it a better life or a dream we long to realize, we reach our destinations by taking many, many small steps in the same direction, one at a time.”
January 15, 2014
“Faith gives you an inner strength and a sense of balance and perspective in life.”
– Gregory Peck
Today was another good day for me, yes I still have my pain but even it being there I still had a good day. Know that you are as good as your mind tells you; you are. You must strengthen yourself mentally and there is when you will begin to feel much better physically; they go hand and hand. “To build inner strength you must build both physical endurance and mental muscle.”
Having mental strength can be difficult for some to achieve, especially when you may be deep in depression but you must try. It’s way worth trying than not trying and being unhappy in your days. You have to be able to notice the differences in how you think, respond, react to things and people. One little small thing as deciding to just say ok to someone instead of becoming upset, or notice the things that truly make you happy, and see how your mental state is at those happy moments.
This may have to be a life long task but you will be proud of yourself every day, when you’re able to be strong and not let anything get you down. FIND YOUR STRENGTH THAT IS ALREADY INSIDE OF YOU.
“With everything that has happened to you, you can either feel sorry for yourself or treat what has happened as a gift. Everything is either an opportunity to grow or an obstacle to keep you from growing. You get to choose.” – Dr. Wayne W Dyer
I know that it can seem like God has forgotten us or is putting us through is and we don’t know why. It can be very hard to see your blessings and to see any gift within yourself anymore, but know God still loves us and for me it helped slow me down, it helped me focus and open my eyes to what I was doing to myself. So I take this pain and I wear it as a badge of honor, I don’t allow it to make me less than anyone else. I still have my gifts and talents The Lord has given me and I will not allow this pain to hold me back anymore.