We are WildFlowers

Posts tagged ‘Venting about Pain’

Edge of the Cliff

Hi, WildFlowers

Hope you all are feeling better than me today. Today I feel so sad, crying and I’m tired. I’m tired and I haven’t even done anything. I don’t even feel like trying to explain what I’m feeling in my body right now. All day long. It’s been a tough few months. Day after day. When the new day starts I’m woke, when the day is moving along I am still, in bed trying to get sleep. By night fall I’m wide awoke again most of the time. There are times that I stay up and try to keep myself busy but with the proper rest, I feel sick.

I feel like nothing I eat or drink agrees with me. To be honest I really don’t want to eat anymore. I try to go as long as I can and not eat. I’m tried of drinking and going to the bathroom. I guess I’m just tried of what is called my life.

One of the most frustrating things are, when you’ve told your family and friends you have fibromyalgia, you have told them all the symptoms even printed them out for them to see and read. Constantly talking about it and explaining. Then when you don’t feel well and they ask what’s wrong, you tell them what you’re feeling and they ask you why are you feeling that way or what did you do. Oh how crazy it is you feel that way etc…

In that moment I feel as if no one cares and of course no one understands. The crap just happens and I don’t know why. It’s like they don’t care to keep that information in their head of What fibromyalgia does to someone. They have no clue.

No one wants to hear about how I feel but then they tell me about their aches and pains as if their pain is more relevant than mine. Don’t forget about the age. People older feel they have a right to feel the way they do and wonder what’s my reason or how, why, would be aching and joints popping, I’m too young to be feeling that way etc…

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Venting

I have been feeling defeated all day and night. And I’ve been trying not to be sad or angry. And I really dislike when I’m trying my best to be in a good mood and people around me are down. (I so hate that) I’m like I so could be in a crappy mood right now and not care how you feel but that’s not me. I just have to be the nurturing type, which lately has been hard for me to do because I don’t have anyone nurturing or comforting me. So I want to say you know that pain you’re feeling right now, yeah I feel that all the time and I’m feeling it now but you don’t know because I look normal as I always do. Every now and then I may make face expressions because it hurts so bad. At times I’ve shouted out bad words because of sharp pain that shots me randomly in my sides or wherever.

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